Transitions and Transformations: Nurturing Yourself Post-Systemic Constellation Therapy

Participating in a Systemic Constellations Therapy Session is a unique experience; one that often defies expectations and is difficult to pre-empt the impact.

Young lady breathing through a difficult moment, at home on her sofa.

During a Constellations session you have been working with the energies and emotions of the Soul and much of what has happened cannot be understood through a purely rational lens. The dynamics that unfolded in your Constellation may have been surprising or different from what you expected. Gentle integration allows the bigger picture to settle and in time, the pieces of the puzzle will make themselves known to you.

If you’re feeling ‘light-headed’ or ‘spaced-out’ after your session, try the following activities to ground your energy.

• Take a walk or swim at a lake or beach, or walk barefoot on the grass.

• Take several deep breaths and imagine you are drawing the Earth’s energy up into your body. Continue until you feel more grounded.

• Soak in a bath with magnesium chloride flakes or Epsom Salts to reduce stress and improve your energy, as the skin is the most effective organ for absorbing magnesium.

• Move your body—shake it out or have a dance session with lively, inspiring music.

•  If applicable, recall the visualisation of your ancestors standing behind you and take in their strength.

Allow yourself time for rest and recovery in the coming days. Drink plenty of water, minimise the consumption of stimulants (coffee, tea, cacao, alcohol) and prioritise ample sleep. Releasing emotions can be tiring, so acknowledge the need for self-care during this time of integration and transition.

The ‘In-between’-space

During Systemic Constellations Therapy, we often gain new perspectives of a situation or a relationship, becoming conscious of parts of the situation or relationship that we could not see previously. As this awareness integrates into the emotional, mental and physical parts of our being, we also become aware of, and start to integrate our shadow (the parts of ourselves we have rejected as they are not accepted by our belief system, environment, upbringing, culture).

To change we must go through a transition zone.  Transition isn’t easy.  Thoughts, beliefs, and habits are all in flux. This can create a sense of groundlessness and discomfort. It is in this space that one comes face to face with their shadow.  C.J. Jung describes this as a ‘tight passage, a narrow door, whose painful constriction no one is spared’. In this space, we see qualities of ourselves that we’d frequently despised in others and we may feel ashamed and guilty. Shadow work can be demanding and challenging, it can cause:

• A sense of chaos  

• Confusion  

• Questioning all beliefs, morals and assumptions  

• Questioning the way you think and make decisions

A flourishing tree with deep adaptive roots growing down through rich red soil on the side of a cliff.

This means that daily life can be deeply affected by choosing to undertake shadow work. Jung says that strength and courage is needed to be able to draw ourselves out the descent, and that it can take time - during which, we may feel trapped or consumed by our shadow, to the extent that we feel like it has overtaken us.   When choosing a Constellations Facilitator, it’s important you feel confident they can hold a safe space you, and provide follow-up sessions for grounding and integration, if needed.

As we move through this space, our first impulse will be to revert to old habits because they offer familiarity. The intent, however, is to persist here and sit with the discomfort of feeling uprooted. Over time the ‘new’ will start to feel more familiar, your roots will gain hold in a healthier, supportive space. Allowing you to thrive and expand into a more fulfilling life.

Recognising that transitions are an integral part of the change process helps to muster up the courage to fully feel and experience the discomfort of growth, knowing that it is part of the journey and the most effective way through. Change requires a letting go of the familiar to welcome the new.  Trusting ourselves and higher forces to unfold a new reality for us.

Every positive change, every shift to a higher level of energy and awareness, involves a rite of passage. To continue up the spiral of personal development; we must endure periods of discomfort and initiation. This principle holds true in every instance of positive transformation, without exception.

As we navigate the spaces of transitions and transformations, your journey matters, and so does sharing your experience. If this post has resonated with you, consider sharing it with others who might find support and inspiration in its words. For premier access to more articles on well-being, transitions, and transformative experiences, be sure to subscribe to my blog. Join our newsletter community for the latest updates on upcoming events, exclusive insights, and a toolkit of well-being resources. Together, let's continue nurturing ourselves and supporting one another on this life-long adventure of growth and self-discovery. Thank you for being a part of the SETUKA community.

Let's get in touch - and until then, take care.

Heidi Kempeneer,

Therapist and Founder of SETUKA , a platform for body-based therapies and well-being services for individuals and organisations.

Find out more about me and what I do.